Friday, February 23, 2007

Libra Mae Sparks: Why do you hate the CNMI?


I missed this "editorial" in Pacific Times by Libra Mae Sparks. Someone recently forwarded it to me:

A signature campaign to BLOCK the approval of the impending MONORAIL project at the GROTTO has already garnered over 1,000 signatories. Environmental advocate ANGELO VILLAGOMEZ is leading the opposition to the proposed monorail project at the Grotto.

I disagree with this. You know, this is our problem. Here we are clamoring for PROGRESS yet, we IMPEDE progress in the name of ENVIRONMENT. Listen, Boy, we can have a MONORAIL without disturbing the environment. The technology will allow a MODERN EQUIPMENT to INTEGRATE itself among the trees and the shrubs and the bushes. Google MONORAIL and you will see several samples of those monorails that are not even visible from afar.

Take note of what the MONORAIL will do to most people. Just take me, for example. Do you know that I have not even reached the bottom steps of the stairs down to the Grotto? Why? Because I am so afraid to go LOOK DOWN and GO DOWN by FOOT. Whereas if I am riding a monorail run by a motor, then I save my ENERGY and NERVES and instead of FEAR, I will feel AWE and more APPRECIATION because I am taken down there with EASE and COMFORT. See the difference?

Do you want more tourists to SEE and APPRECIATE what Mr. Angelo Villagomez described as one of the best, if not the best, NATURAL and CULTURAL TREASURE, one of the best diving destinations in the world? Well, then allow the construction of the MONORAIL !! What about the DISABLED individuals, those who are on WHEELCHAIRS, the MAN'AMKO whose knees can no longer traverse the 100 or more steps? You are depriving these people and ME, personally to see how beautiful the Grotto is. Let PROGRESS TAKE ITS COURSE, Boy, and don't let your name be associated with RUSTIC mentality. PROGRESS is PROGRESS and there ain't no way you can STOP IT! Do you want to be a hero? Well, then GROW UP!!!
Dang it! I can't believe I missed this "editorial" when it first came out!

I find this "editorial" hilarious for a number of reasons, the main one being that I only talked to the Saipan Tribune about this story (the second probably being that she writes like she has Tourette's Syndrome). I never talked to anyone from Pacific Times. Pacific Times must read the other local newspapers to look for stories. Who knew?

I fail to see how protecting the diving industry on Saipan from cockanany ideas impedes progress, or wait, I mean IMPEDES PROGRESS. I also don't understand the "want to be a hero" or the "grow up" comments. You were talking about PROGRESS and then you went off on a tangent. WTF, mate?

By the way:

I dove the Grotto on Monday. I'll be diving it again in 8 hours. Who are you going to trust, someone that readily admits that she's never even been to the Grotto, or someone that goes there at least once a month, if not once a week?

At least she had the courtesy to call me Mr. Angelo Villagomez.

Save the Grotto, bitches.

21 comments:

i'm a BOY 2 : ) said...

hey BOY!!! : ) isn't it funny how PT was 4BB recently and now they're ALL 4BT?!? coincidence??? keep up the fight, angelo (um...BOY : )

Mona said...

I am inundated with questions.

Is she a legitimate writer, or someone who says she's published because she has access to a xerox machine and a stapler?

Did she also call you "Boy"?

"Whereas if I am riding a monorail run by a motor..."-- What else would run a monorail? Fairy dust? Ignorant people who had never been there before because their fear impeded them?

Didn't we already address the issues of the disabled and elderly swimming in the Grotto?

"PROGRESS is PROGRESS and there ain't no way you can STOP IT! Do you want to be a hero?" What does heroism have to do with this? What's with all the capitalization? I hate caps lock abuse. Words don't need to say, "Look at me!" I can read, Libra Mae Sparks.

She should get a piggy back ride if she doesn't want to make the descent on her own two feet.

Angry Sicilian said...

Angelo... such an activist. You make me wish I was more active.

Anonymous said...

Ai Boy,

Welcome to Saipan Angiboy.

dengre said...

It looks like you need the Monorail Song from the Simpsons

I'm glad to see that all the hopes for the future haven't been placed on casinos. Somebody is really thinking with this monorail idea...

Melissa said...

I think I should endorse Libra Mae for president. Whaddya think, Boy?

Seriously, this woman must be suffering from some vitamin deficiency... rickets? Scurvy?

Marianas Life said...

We used to call it the Babauta Times and then after the election we started calling it the Fitial Times. Always good for a laugh. Her editing skills suck!!! Scary to think she's the "editor" of that crappy paper. I have 8th graders that write better. Nice cartoon.

bradinthesand said...

Holy Crap,
She actually lives here? No way! How can someone who lives in the CNMI

A: Not know you (cus you're all cool n stuff)
B: Admit they're such a weak suck (oh heavens, the stairs)
C: Be the editor of the rag and speak like that (oh, PT is all the rage now)
D: Be all "Boy" about it (Are you kidding me?)

Sounds like someone gave Sparky a voice and she's going to run with it. Has anyone even heard of her before?

Saipan Middle Road said...

First, this writer doesn't live here. She writes for PT from California. She has a reporter visa working for a nursing home, according to reliable sources.

Does anybody read this paper? your fault people, you read this paper. ;-)

bradinthesand said...

After checking Sparky out at the PT website I decided to critique the "her" work.

My response...

You must not be a real person because real people would never put their name next to the drivel you publish. I am a real reporter for a daily paper and we know our kind. You are clearly of a lesser ilk. Kind of like SPAM to our steak.

To call your ramblings articles would be like calling the Naru Building a National Monument. That’s just my professional opinion.

A bit of research would serve you well, but I suppose that writing behind the protection of a pen name provides you a certain sense of false bravado.

I especially love your writing about FDR…

“Those who formulated the Retirement program were STUPIDLY SHORT-SIGHTED in the same ranks as US President F.D. ROOSEVELT when he formulated in 1968, the Federal WELFARE PROGRAM commonly known as the MEDIC-AID program for the indigents in the USA.”

Perhaps you might have taken the time to research that Roosevelt served as the 32nd President of the United States from his election in 1932 until his death on April 12, 1945.

He was a remarkable man but I only know of one man who rose from the dead (two if you count Lazarus), and his time came far before that of FDR during WWII.

There are many other things for you to learn as well. I am quite sure that you are not from here because of your use of “neh” in the last paragraph of your rambling regarding Rota.

The accepted local convention is written “nai” while the Japanese spelling is “ne” though they both mean essentially the same thing and are used the same way. Where exactly are you from? I happen to live in the CNMI, do you? I gave my phone number with this message along with my email address for you to reply. Hope you do.

Sincerely,
Brad

The Saipan Blogger said...

She writes like a 17 year old Freshman community college student majoring in Studio Art.

Melissa said...

She sounds more like a Bowling major to me...

People like that shouldn't be allowed to roam free. I say, here's to the institution of anti-Stupidity laws.

KAP said...

Give it all of the attention it deserves, it's obviously cobbled together.

Probably some sort of scam, tho it's nice of them to give Charles Reyes and John DelRosario columns so they can keep in practice.

My wife drags it home from Winchell's once in a while. Otherwise I would forget it exists.

saipanmiddleroad.com said...

Brad,

Sparky used to be with the Trib. Didn't you know that? Bowling major, that's so funny. You think Capital Bowling Center would hire her as coach?

Seriously, I agree with most of the comments. No one has the right to say something about the CNMI when he or she doesn't live here anymore and definitely has no clue of what's been going around the island. I would suggest for the owner of that paper to bring back their editors to this island.

Can you believe that, the editors/writers of that paper are based in CA.

Jeffrey C. Turbitt said...

Hey, we need a monorail. How else can we give our scarce public money away to a friendly Fitial firm for frivolous bullsh**?Unintentional alliteration.

Saipan Writer said...

middleoftheroad said "No one has the right to say something about the CNMI when he or she doesn't live here anymore."

Wrong. We all have the right to say whatever we want. I express opinions about the US all the time, but I haven't lived there in 20 years. Doesn't mean I don't care. Doesn't mean I have less right, intelligence or value than others. Doesn't mean my opinions are incorrect or unhelpful.

Better to just point out the flaws in Libra Mae Sparks's "reasoning" or the expression of it--and there are plenty of flaws.

Dengre and Jeff Turbitt-hilarious posts! It helps to have some humor when facing ridiculous arguments. Keeps them in the proper perspective.

I already signed the petition against the Monorail. Is there anything else we can do to kill this plan?

bradinthesand said...
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bradinthesand said...
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bradinthesand said...

OMFG, Libra is Lek Lek? No Way! I love her, too. How can she write so poorly? Makes me a little sick. I need to call her and give her a piece of my...um, mind.

saipanmiddleroad said...

Saipan Writer,

I agree. We all practice freedom of speech here. But as contextualizing the matter, she writes for a broadsheet, a columnist or whatever, that's supposed to be a paper in the CNMI. Where's credibility from sparky when she doesn't write and edit this Saipan "fraud" sheet here on this island?

I can write anything about the world, express my comments about it, but where's credibility? But, I guess going back to sparky, since many have reacted, then i guess hers (credibility) is questionable.

I would've respected your comment, but saying it "wrong" adamantly in your second paragraph, where's freedom of speech there?

You could've written, "in your opinion, that's wrong!"

but, hey,it's sparky that we're bashing here...

thanks.

Anonymous said...

oh you guys are just teeming with envy that you do not have the leverage libra mae does. at least she has received some attention, while you do not. and i happen to enjoy p times. stop dragging the paper home if you claim its a rag. period. tsk tsk... the green-eyed monster rears its ugly head.